Like a dandelion up through the pavement, I persist

Content notes: There are a few moments of self-pity in here :D I don't like being negative in general, but I thought I'd be honest about things, both for myself and for my future self who will totally be over it, yet able to remember what it was like not to be that cool, thanks to this post XD

I've written quite a few fics in tiny fandom-of-ones before, sometimes even for manga that didn't have a translation available anywhere so really no hope of finding fellow fans :D And I enjoy it, like, finishing a book, seeing there's no fics for your particular vision (or at all!), scribbling and dropping one, and then huuuh sometimes nothing because it was just about two background characters that deeply intrigued me and apparently only me. Or sometimes, maybe once a year, getting a comment like "I just finished reading the book and I'm so glad someone shared the same vision!" -- that feels sooo good :D Like having left a little treasure out there for someone else to find. (It's what I imagine geocaching is like??) And it's happened to me in the reverse so many times, too! Bless you yuletide folks in particular, for unknowingly having had my back so often!

( Writing for a tiny fandom and then staying there, however, feels very different )

( 'Write for yourself first' - sure! Why share, though? )

( K-9 canon aside, because it's been too long. But also the additional weight of not having folks to discuss canon with )

1. Keep writing, stop posting
2. Rope more people into the fandom
3. Get into a bigger fandom in parallel -- the bigger the better!
4. Mindset change: posting to connect vs posting to archive / connect quietly
5. Wait to post so there is less attachment to the story
6. RP being someone who doesn't care like you wish you were

( I think I've basically done all of these 🤔 )

This got so long again XD XD I'm adding headers! But also, now, with the important question!!

Beloved tiny fandom and fandom-of-one writers and creators out there, how do you do it? And how do you keep it up? How do you manage the psychology of it? Do you have down moments regardless of the joy of it, and how do you handle those?? Clearly I do suck at it, so I'm all ears! It'd be cool to reduce the amount of non-joy as I go back to my gigantic file of K-9 ideas and throw them into the cauldron, eventually... :D Any coping mechanism to add to the list? And I think this all probably applies to podficcers and icon makers too, who tend to navigate smaller circles. How do you sustain it?? Please allow me to learn your secrets :D